Innocence Need Not Apply
by Guardian54
Summary: This is what happens when I believe that Miho cannot possibly turn out that innocent with the iron fist of a family she had to grow up in. A darker, more hateful Miho hates Tankery and anything to do with it but if pressed, wants to win at any cost short of her subordinates' health. Rated M cause extreme gore in first Chapter (premonition dream gone very wrong).
1. One-Shot

A/N: The following is what you get when I watch the first episode of Girls und Panzer after playing World of Tanks and getting various crew members killed often. It's also the beginning of a reinterpretation I'm considering for GuP, with a far more jaded Miho (don't understand how she could grow up the way she did with a fanatic of a mother like that). This has _nothing_ to do with my other stories, and yes, the title for this chapter is literally "One-Shot" since originally it was a one-shot by that name.

This is the premonition dream at the beginning of Episode 1, gone sour, EXTREMELY sour. **You are advised to skip to Chapter 2 if you cannot stomach extreme graphic gore, all chapters that are gory enough to be M rated will contain this warning, the rest of the fic will remain T-rated.**

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Chapter 1: One-Shot

_Unknown Tournament Area, Five Dream-Scapes_

"Juke around as much as you can, British tanks have high rates of fire with their small-calibre guns, and with our thin armour we can't stand a direct hit without being knocked out of the match." Miho barked at the crew of the Panzer IV Ausf D as rock chunks blasted off the nearby cliffs from near misses—_or were they purposeful hits to the cliffs to try to trap them by rock falls?_ She thought—cascaded down, plinking off the tank's armour, as she held onto the cushioned cupola, looking ahead but also back every few seconds as Mako expertly dodged and juked. The ranges of engagment along with the lack of vertical stabilizers on their opponents' vehicles meant this could actually work on the wide, rocky, bumpy road as they led the British tanks to the ambush zone their allies had prepared themselves in. A shell whistled by so close that Miho could feel the wind of its passage ruffle her clothes as the tank hit a bump, she sighed in relief at the miss…

"Did you throw up Miho? Is that why…" Hana, the loader of the vehicle, looked over her shoulder that had begun to develop a wet spot and almost threw up herself. "Miho… your… your arm…"

"What?" Miho adjusted her grip on the rim of the cupola as she manoeuvred to look down at her right arm, suddenly realizing why she hadn't felt it adjust… It was gone from just below the shoulder and a slowly twitching, paling hand, with a bit of ragged flesh where the wrist should have been, rolled off the front of the turret, then off the front deck, leaving a thin trail off leaked blood as it fell off the front armour due to the vibrations and bucking of the hull and was ground under one of the tracks, leaving a small red smear on the ground that quickly disappeared behind the tank as Hana yanked Miho inside and tore her uniform sleeve off, applying a tourniquet to the wound while wide-eyed in fear and sudden realization that this was real… that their safety measures had failed, and that her mortality was no longer far away. Yukari looked little better as she trembled in her seat, the shell in her arms shaking almost as much as her lower jaw which was chattering against her teeth, eyes glued to Miho's critical wound but unable to even say anything to the girl she idolized.

"Turn the turret around, fire high explosive at them, if we can knock out or damage their guns, we'll be a bit safer." Miho swallowed dryly, almost hyperventilating before she forced herself to calm down once the tourniquet was tied off. "I still need to keep watch for anything that can get us all out alive. Thank you, Hana, start firing as soon as you are able."

"…Yes, yes." Hana put her eyes back to the optics of the vehicle as the turret swung around and they shifted their positions in the basket—something not actually present in the real Panzer IV during the Second World War but was installed for comfort during sensha-do… but she couldn't help but feel fear settle inside her as Miho resumed standing in the cupola, observing the surroundings as Hana fired repeatedly, though failing to damage a gun barrel each time due to the wild manoeuvres of their tank much as how the opponents, though cruising along, mostly missed due to the shaking inherent in movement on the uneven road.

"Hana, turn left ninety degrees and elevate as far as you can, hit that rock outcrop and we might be able to block them off." She understood what her leader meant, this wasn't about the match anymore, they needed to get away and at least get Miho treated, and why weren't the judges calling the match off with such a severe injury already occurring?

There was the whistling of another near miss flying over the turret and a soft thumping sound against the hull as Hana fired a round… the outcrop came down, but not enough of it to block the path. The routine "Loaded!" call did not come from Yukari either, and Hana looked over just in time to see Yukari reach a trembling hand out to Miho's shaking legs, where a damp patch had formed in the front of her skirt and urine was running down her legs, staining her stockings.

Miho felt something, or she thought she felt something, and saw a plume of shocked air signalling the passage of a shell seemingly under her, then she suddenly seemed to fall against the turret roof as if without support, and, with the turret placed sideways, tumbled down onto the hot radiators of the rear hull and, yelping as her skin was scorched. She pushed instinctively away… she rolled off the back of the tank and tried to sit up, but nothing happened. She frowned as the tank rumbled away and huffed slightly…

The loader barely touched the commander's legs before they folded and landed back in the seat with a thud. Hana, and Yukari for that matter, really threw up as Miho's torso was missing from the hips up, the torn end ending in a pile of mangled intestines, the stench of half-digested food and blood was atrocious inside the confined space of the turret and as Hana turned the turret back, she saw Miho's upper half just…lying in the road, if the top of her head and shoulders being visible was any indication.

Miho propped herself up on one elbow and one bloody stump and looked down, away from her departing vehicle, and realized what had happened before the strength seemed to bleed out of her arm as she watched the rumbling treads of the Churchill roll closer. She felt the pain for the first time, and it was immense, inducing her to try to throw up but finding nothing to cough up for her stomach and everything below her diaphragm was gone. She didn't know why she still had that and the associated ability to breathe. She wished she hadn't as the pain dominated her every sense and every thought while the treads of the heavy tank loomed over her before grinding what was left of her under it. She felt the remaining bones in her torso turning into powder and be ground into the bloody paste that oozed from between the links of the steel treads as it rumbled over her, and then had an out-of-body experience. She saw her skull being crushed like a grape under the tracks and a mix of red fluid, grey paste, and fragments of white solid ooze from between the treads, and she felt intensely ill at the sight of only her left forearm and hand lying intact in the road next to the long red smear of paste that was once her.

"Miho's gone!" Hana shouted over the intercom in a panic at her friend Saori.

The radio-woman relayed this to the other vehicles of the team as "They got the commander, we can't see what's going on!" Then she switched to the intercom "Even Mako seems shaken by the news!" She said, also somewhat panicked. She was telling the truth, as Mako's eyes were open even wider than Miho's usually were.

"Keep loading Yukari or we'll all die here!" Hana barked as she resumed trying to aim the gun to compensate for Mako's even more insane driving. The loader responded by loading faster than ever, half-blinded by tears at the commander's untimely death.

"…Yes!" Hana had a bad feeling about this response from Yukari as she herself had given the same word to Miho moments before her death… She found herself abruptly right as cold washed over her… the first solid hit on the Panzer 4 had slammed into the machine-gun port in the mantlet and bored through the weak spot in the armour. It tore a plate-sized hole through her chest and the seat behind her, spraying the inside of the turret with bits of shattered flesh, before she slumped in her seat, hands feeling weakly at the inside of the wound… _so this is what my intestines feel like… soft, slimy, squishy, hot but quickly cooling in the air…_ Like Miho before her Hana felt an intense urge to be sick but could not as she had no stomach left, nor heart, nor most of her esophagus or lungs. As she watched her body grow still from the outside, her blood and other bodily fluids soaking the seat cushion until it could never be cleaned completely, Hana felt herself shiver, which struck her as odd as she didn't have a living body left to shiver with, right?

"Hana's gone too!" Yukari's voice had risen a whole octave from her usual.

Saori reported this to the others—_only 500m to go to the ambush zone…_ she barely managed to think the thought—as "The gunner bought the farm! Our accuracy will suffer!"

It was while the breech was open that the next casualty happened, a 40mm shell, a two-pounder, slammed itself down the barrel of the gun and the 75mm cartridge Yukari had just placed into place exploded in her face. Blood spurted out from between scrabbling fingers at the girl's throat as she clutched uselessly at it with one hand while the other covered her bleeding eyes, the screaming didn't stop until it faded to a choked gurgle as she slumped onto the ruined gun just as Saori looked back into the turret basket at the alarming noises. "They got our loader!" She shouted into the radio "Please, someone, anyone, help, save us! I… I don't want to die like Miho, Hana and Yukari…" There was only static, since the antennae had long since been shot away…

The left drive axle was next to go, and the tank slewed around a full one-eighty from the hit and the abrupt and total loss of power to the left track along with the track being thrown, and both girls gulped before two hits to the front armour of the early Pz 4 sent chunks of hot metal lancing into Saori's chest from where the ball mount of the hull machine gun had been hit and dissolved Mako's head completely as a six-pounder shell punched through the driver view slot and through her head, making the entirely of her skull explode from hydrostatic shock and spray the inside of the driver's compartment with red and grey splatters.

Saori was alone now, but she thumbed on the radio anyhow as she reached over and tried to move the tank so that they would take hits to the engine instead of the front plate… putting anything between her and death sounded good to her as she said "The Drive is a goner… ha… The controls aren't responding!" She choked out, barely managing to get more air in on her next breath "Crew members… are killed…we're out of action… forever." She could not breath in again, no matter how hard she tried, as the wounds in her chest sucked air in from outside instead of allowing it into her lungs, and as dark spots clouded her vision Saori wished she had died quickly like Mako, whose mangled neck stump was still gurgling blood onto Saori's slumped shoulder with every spasm of her body which hadn't quite realized it was already dead.

Saori watched from third person as her corpse released its bowels, further stinking up the inside of the vehicle, which began to burn after another two hits to the still live engine. Ammunition cooked off in a series of short, merry pops that further tore apart the four and a half corpses of the crew as the noxious smell of burning gasoline and plastics mixed with the smell of urine, feces, blood and gut contents. The five disembodied spirits also felt the smell of cooking, then burning meat surrounding them before it all washed away into darkness.

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_SS (School Ship) Ooarai_

Five girls woke up with a start on the first day of their second year of high school drenched in sweat and feeling intensely sick. _Who… who were those people… and those events… it felt so… real… it can't really happen like that, can it?_ They each thought as they were bent over their toilets, vomiting up bile since there was nothing left in their stomachs after the night's sleep.

Well, one thing was for sure, none of them would be eating any roasted meats for quite a while.

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A/N: So there you have it, the premonition dream of my reinterpreted GuP, echoing from the mind of a far more psychologically damaged Miho to the people destiny would clap her with.

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	2. Trolled By Fate

A/N: So I decided this wouldn't be such a one-shot after all. Behold a more cautious Miho, and one more prone to underhanded methods, including using any and all goodwill she accrues. After all, if Kuromorimine and history lessons taught her one thing, it was that tactics weren't always enough, sometimes, pure armour + firepower (see Raseiniai), and other times, operational-level coordination (Operation Bagration and the Battle of the Bulge) were important too. Also, many more nightmares and some dream synchrony lie in wait for our victims… I mean crews here MWAHAHAHA. Anglerfish Team will also have a notable common fear of barbecues and meats prepared using ovens, I wonder why…

**Just watched GuP**, with Episode 10… Clearly Hana's flower arrangement represents a typical Catastrophic Kill. On Episode 11: This is why Fail-Platooning happens in WoT, I suppose *insert trollface here*. Episode 12: Yukari activated Adrenaline Rush perk! About the prequel manga, Emi could not be any more Severa-like (from Fire Emblem: Awakening) if she tried, right down to the red hair in two tails and even her mother has a hairstyle/colour similar to Cordelia's too (but not quite as impractically long)… someone needs to sue someone for character theft, depending on who put their stuff out first (the manga or the game).

**Note: I'm writing this because I want to practice my tactical manoeuvre writing before continuing the SI Archives/Harmony Shepard series, am currently too tired to pick up the huge universe (so much to keep track of…) I built in my SupCom crossover series, and don't want to wait for Season 2 of RWBY. At last, a completed work I can use without attachments to any of my other works, how wonderful… how **_**FREE**_**. Also, Fire Emblem, well… that trololol needs time to ferment.**

**For the Record**: I honestly think the opening sequence for Girls und Panzer abridged by Gunmetal Stug on YouTube is better than the opening for the actual show.

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Chapter 2: Trolled By Fate

_SS (School Ship) Ooarai_

Miho Nishizumi flinched as she walked by a bakery "The smell of fresh bread is always good… but the ovens that must be in there…" _heat… enclosed spaces, steel walls…_ she shivered slightly, still affected by the horrible nightmare—or was it some sort of premonition?—that had woken her up and made her feel to sick to eat any breakfast. "Hmm, we don't have any of those around my house…" she tried to distract herself with some of the stuff in the front window of a convenience store she passed, but failed, as she managed to stop just short of walking face-first into a sign featuring anglerfish-faced pedestrians as a warning sign for vehicle drivers "Heh, that's kind of cute…" The thought of a pink stylized anglerfish painted on the side of the turret of a disabled and burning Panzer 4 Ausf. D entered her mind and terminated that thought abruptly.

"I wonder what we'll watch today…" A group of three girls in the same school uniform walked past her

"What should we get after school?"

"Good question…"

"We just ate breakfast and now it's all we're thinking about." One of the girls laughed

"Whatever…"

_I hope the school doesn't have too much in terms of cliques… so that I can slot into the social life instead of being the outcast…_ Miho thought. _At least they seemed reasonably amicable… we'll see how they deal with strangers soon enough._

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Saori met up with Hana where they'd agreed to. Neither talking about the nightmare they'd had that night, preferring to keep it out of sight and out of mind… until the former registered the presence of someone's face on their class list. "That… that face…" Saori muttered.

"Which…" Hana went dead silent as she stared, before raising a shaking finger and tapping on one Miho Nishizumi's photo, "that one?"

"Hana… are you okay?"

"I… I'm fine."

Saori puffed up her cheeks, since this was really bothering Hana and she wanted to get to the bottom of it. "Don't lie to me!"

"I just had a funny dream, that's all." The mental image of feeling her guts squelch around her fingers in the gaping hole that bored out most of her ribcage, and then later the smell of cooking, burning flesh left Hana feeling cold and clammy and was most certainly NOT "funny" in any, way, shape or form to her.

"Did it involve us dying?"

"…How did you…"

"I had a nightmare too, did it involve Tankery?" Saori was looking even more wide-eyed than usual.

Hana felt very disturbed by this point "…Yes…" _Dream synchrony only happens in myths and legends, right? Was it… was it a premonition? Am I going to die this year? No, no, however freaky it is, if we know it's potentially coming then we can avoid it by side-step. Broad gestures to change any perceived fate generally backfire, but sidesteps don't, at least, in fictional settings, which are the only places I've heard of this sort of freaky occurrence_

"Wow that's… well, I wouldn't say amazing given how horrible it was and the amount of detail I could feel from it, but… maybe it tells us who we'll have as new friends this semester!" Saori was talking even faster than usual, which meant she was very nervous.

"Mako Reizei?" Hana arched a delicate eyebrow at the idea of being on a Tankery team with the top student of the school. From what she'd heard of Mako just getting her out of bed every day in time for Tankery practices would require the entirety of the rest of the crew to pull off and might as well qualify as another Wonder of the Modern World. "And that last girl? Yukari… something?"

Saori was blazing through her previous year's yearbook "Yukari Hayate… no, doesn't look right… hmm… this one?" She held up the yearbook page from the previous year that showed a picture of Yukari Akiyama.

"How are you so calm about this… unnatural occurrence?"

"We've known each other for years, Hana, you know full well that I find this thrilling, it's like fate's warning us about the hazards we'll face this year so that we can avoid them."

_Heh, this is why we're friends, we think similarly enough… though admittedly Saori's a lot more vocal about it_ "I thought so too…"

"Great…"

* * *

_Lunchtime…_

"I think we should make our approach run now, get the shock of our meeting over with assuming she had the same premonition we did!" Saori whispered loudly enough that Hana suspected the only reason Miho didn't notice was because she was pre-occupied with getting her stuff together from where she was having a hard time with the bottom of the admittedly somewhat short desk.

"I don't think that's a good idea, Saori, we don't want to startle her, if she had the same nightmare we did, it'll be easy to make her averse to us from fear for her life."

"It'll be fine!" Saori then called out "Hey girl! You wanna grab some lunch?"

The way Miho whipped around probably said something about how jumpy she was feeling… _That voice! It sounded like, but no, it couldn't be…_ She turned around and saw a cheerful orange-haired girl and a beautiful black-haired girl, and her brain locked up as she sprang to standing at attention as had been drilled into her from her "childhood", imitating her older sister in many cases. _What… what is this madness? This almost reminds of an old cartoon I watched when I was younger, something about "I know you, I walked with you once upon a dream"? Except in this case it's "I _died_ with you once upon a dream"… I thought I was seeing things in the class list, but… it's real. You're real. How… how could this be?_

"See that, Saori? You startle Nishizumi, you'll make a bad first impression." Hana found her friend's greeting as cheesy as physically possible.

Saori grinned sheepishly "Sorry, I was just trying to be funny…"

Hana smiled before turning back toward Miho, who was frozen in place "Anyway, to repeat the question, if you'd like to have lunch with us, we'd both be delighted."

It was as if someone had smashed an ice sculpture with a very large hammer, such was the abrupt breaking of Miho's funk. "With… what? With me?"

"Mmhmm…" Saori and Hana nodded.

* * *

"We managed to pick her up!" Saori chirped happily, as if not talking about someone standing right next to her in the cafeteria line.

"To be honest, as soon as we saw you we wanted to try talking to you, Nishizumi." Hana said.

Miho was surprised, why would they want to talk to her on sight? "Uh… really? But… why?"

Saori had to bullshit something real fast to cover things up "You seemed a bit jittery, so we thought it might be interesting to talk to you."

"…Interesting?" _Something felt wrong about what she just said… very wrong…_

"So my name is…" Saori was cut off abruptly.

"…Saori Takebe, born June twenty-second." The just-named girl gasped in surprise at this. "Hana Isuzu, born December sixteenth."

Hana smiled "That's right."

"We just met and you already know both our birthdays!" Saori seemed as excited as ever…

"Yeah, I looked at our class list and learned everything I could about everyone, so that I could make friends with people easier." Miho explained as they moved with the line. _I never expected this though, I thought it might be a coincidence that you two were in my class with those names and faces, but now… now I'm not so sure anymore._

"See? I knew you'd be interesting, by the way, can I call you by your first name."

"Huh?"

Hana smiled at Saori's forwardness, it was very typical of her after all… "Miho is fine, right?"

Miho grinned widely "Omigosh it's like we're friends already!"

"Here you go, your teriyaki salmon lunch!" The tray was completed, and Miho pulled a very dumb manoeuvre with it, a spin that left Hana and Saori both amazed at her regaining balance and not spilling anything.

They scouted out a table before Miho spoke again to start the chatter this time "I'm so glad I was able to make friends, I moved here to Ooarai all by myself so I was kind of worried."

"I see, but you never know what might happen right? You know, like a complicated love triangle, or someone says they don't like you right before you confess your love, or your boyfriend cheats on you…" Saori went off on her usual tangent while stirring up her food, and Hana smiled slightly as she drank her soup.

* * *

**A/N**: For the record, I find Hana's tray of food around 7:20 in Episode 1 to be absurdly huge. A huge bowl of what seems to be ramen that should be about the whole volume of her stomach if you look at the image, a plate of stir-fry of some sort, a bowl of soup, and a large bowl of rice? Really, how the hell is that girl supposed to put it all away? It's not like she's two metres tall and halfway to being the Hulk in terms of physical size…

* * *

"Uh… yeah…" _Note to self: Saori Takebe is obsessed with boys and romance… Hey, we can dazzle her with the topic if we must persuade her to do something… No, stop it, Bad Miho!_

Hana thought this might be a good time to try a probe to see if Miho had the same vision "Did something bad happen with your family? Family in-fighting" There was a small shiver in her spine as something felt weird about saying that, almost as if she'd jinxed herself, but Hana did not let it show. "or something related to an inheritance maybe?"

"No… nothing like that…" _Unless you count hunting for my own style of Tankery as family in-fighting between me and Mother._

There was an awkward silence before Hana tried to break it "we should eat before everything gets cold." Chatter eventually picked up again, though Miho and Hana were both very careful about not talking with their mouths full, Saori had chipmunk-like cheek skills with talking and chewing successfully at the same time without spraying anything.

XX

"Wanna get some tea on the way back?" Saori said as she sat across from Miho after the first period of afternoon classes finished.

Miho hugged herself happily "It's like we're real high school girls…"

"Pretty sure we are, actually." Hana put in.

"By the way, I have a question… I've been worrying about something." Saori began. Hana grimaced slightly behind her back, expecting another tangent regarding boys… _You know, if you want to deal closely with boys so badly, we could transfer to a co-ed school…_

"I'm a terrible woman, you know…"

_Yep, my prediction was correct…_ Hana sighed "Ugh… not this conversation again…"

"A lot of guys have been approaching me lately and it started to get kind of awkward… I'm not looking for any drama."

"A lot of guys?"

"Yeah, the people who live near me, every morning they're all like 'Hi there! And you're as cheery as ever today!'" Saori mimed a hand-wave and thumbs-up.

Hana stopped herself from laughing just in time "If that's the case I'm pretty sure they're just saying hi to you."

"Uh, no way, they've totally got the hots for me."

"You're easy to approach and you've got a great personality, that's why it's no surprise everyone wants to be friends with you." Miho stated what she thought was obvious. Saori blushed at the praise "I think it's great that you can get along with other people without even worrying about it. You know, at lunch today, when you came up and talked to me out of the blue, it made my day! I never thought I'd make such a great friend so soon."

"Hmm…" Saori looked off to the side in embarrassment.

"I think you're pretty great yourself, Nishizumi." Hana put in.

"Huh? No way, I'm totally lame… but Isuzu, you're cool-headed and confident and mature… and so smart… I mean, I'm really jealous."

"I… I'm glad to hear that, since people always say I'm too uptight…"

"Really? Well that's better than me. Back at my old school the kids used to always say I'm irresponsible. How can I become more like you?"

"I used to do flower arrangements, so maybe that's why."

"What? That's so cool! I've always wanted to try that… It's all feminine and graceful and stuff…" Hana wasn't sure what to say in reply to that, so she stayed silent. "Thanks for making friends with me on my first day, it means a lot…" Miho bowed as much as the desk would allow her.

"Uh… no, it was our pleasure." Hana bowed slightly

Thee people entered the room and the class went silent. Someone questioned "Why is the president here?"

One of the two girls standing on either side of the rather short "president" pointed Miho out after they scanned the room, and the girl with twin tails—kind of reminding Miho a bit of Emi, though this girl's hair was ochre instead of bright red and her tails were further back, and she also didn't seem like a tsundere—hailed her with a raised hand and a too-wide smile "Oh hey, Nishizumi!"

Miho reflexively sat at attention "Yes?" She glanced at Saori for an explanation as to who the other two were.

"It's the student council president, along with the VP and PR agent." Saori said as the three marched over to Miho's table.

She noted that one of the girls, the one who'd pointed her out in the first place, had a monocle on in half-glasses form. The same girl said severely "We need to talk for a moment."

"We do?" _I have a bad feeling about this._

She was pulled out the classroom door for the talk "I don't know what you were planning for your mandatory elective, but sign up for Tankery!" The president said too-cheerily, close enough that Miho was thinking _she's more in-your-face than Emi was, that's for sure…_ "Right?"

"I uh… Are you sure? I thought this school didn't have a Tankery class." _I finally broke free, and now you want me to do that again? No, no, No, NO, NONONONONONONOOOOOOOO!_ Some music she heard a long time started echoing in her head, she couldn't recognize the song but she knew she had heard it somewhere _All that I have left inside, is a soul that's filled with pride! I tell you NEVER AGAIN! Their depraved society, didn't end up killing me! Scream with me NEVER AGAIN!_

"We didn't, but we're starting it back up this year." Monocle-girl said.

"Yeah, but… the only reason I transferred here in the first place was because I thought they didn't have Tankery…"

"AHAHAHA! Sounds like Fate!"

_That dream… could it have been a premonition of some sort? A warning so that even if I'm forced into this I can avert our deaths?_ "I thought we could choose whatever mandatory elective we wanted…"

"Anyway thanks a bunch!" For a not-too-tall girl the council president sure could smack Miho's back pretty hard…

"Uh…" She was left staring after the three in the hallway as they walked off, lost in memory and drowning in her personal sea of loathing for the "sport" that humanity had made of what was originally war and death, much like the gladiators of old save with a few more safety measures.

XX

Miho might as well have been a vegetable given how she was responding, or rather not responding, to Hana and Saori, who both had claimed to also not feel well, hauling her between them toward the infirmary, her feet dragging along the floor. Her mind was trapped, full of pure hate at her mother's disapproval while she was resuscitating a crew member of the Panzer 3 that had acted as the vanguard scout for the formation but had slipped down a slope into the river they were proceeding near and sunk into it. The girl she was doing chest compressions on finally coughed a couples times and Miho turned her onto her side so that she could vomit onto the wet, rocky ground. She and the Pz 3's commander had towed the radio operator to shore before starting CPR, since they'd evacuated the driver first, with the loader and gunner (the latter with a bit of help from Miho and the loader) managing to escape on their her own to the surface just before Miho told them to go to the shore and went down with the commander for her second rescue dive. Her mother was saying the commander and loader could have save the radio girl themselves and they could have won since it had been the two flag tanks face-to-face on that slope. The IS-2 behind the smaller Soviet tank needed time to manoeuvre around the T-34-85 for a shot, it had apparently been Miho's fault her crew was so drilled into obeying structured orders that they couldn't just take the damned shot before their Tiger I was hit by a 122mm shell that would have penetrated the upper front plate. Miho still didn't understand why Kuromorimine used a Tiger I for their flag tank instead of the Konigstiger i.e. Tiger II which they had in stock, with better armour protection all-round, particularly the front, and could bounce an IS-2's alpha strike frontally unless hit in the lower front plate or the cupola. Tradition was to be subsumed to the cause of victory, after all…

Once the nurse was back in her office and thus hopefully out of earshot, Hana looked over from her infirmary bed "Miho," Hana's voice brought a flash of a new image crashing in Miho's mind, that of the long-haired girl's mouth working up and down silently as she felt at the giant hole torn through her before she slumped against the gun controls, dead. "are you feeling okay?"

_You shouldn't be asking me that, the dead don't speak… wait, what… uh oh, let's hope I didn't think out loud…_ "Huh?" She jerked awake and looked around frantically, suddenly realizing that they were all very much alive and that they were in the infirmary. She began to get up before Saori help up a hand to stop her.

"No, just lie down!" Miho had another sudden flash image of the same hand, stained with blood, clutching at the girl's chest where two jagged pieces of metal had punched into her as she suffocated from collapsed lungs. She fell back against the pillow, trying to evict the thought from her mind despite the bad taste the mention of Tankery had forced down her throat.

"If you want to leave school early I'll go back and pick up your bag…" Hana offered.

"Thanks Isuzu…" she muttered, reminding herself that the nightmare she had would not be allowed to come to pass.

"What did the student council president say to you back there?" Saori pressed.

"If you don't mind, could you tell us?" Hana double-teamed with the orange-haired girl

"She said they'd be… bringing the Tankery course back this year…" Miho muttered miserably.

Hana frowned "A Tankery course? I know it has a long history, but it's not very popular…"

Saori's eyes were much wider as she showed she'd made the connection between their shared nightmare and their real lives "But wait… I don't get what this has to do with you…"

"She… told me to choose Tankery for my mandatory elective."

Saori's eyes grew even wider as what seemed to her to resemble destiny smacked her in the face "But why?"

"Because I… um…"

"Is she trying to bully you for some reason? Wait… the president, you and someone else are involved in a love triangle!"

On Miho's other side, Hana let her head fall to her pillow in exasperation.

"No, no!"

Hana sat back up somewhat "If she went out of her way to ask you to take Tankery, you must be some sort of master fighter. Are you a Tankery champion and were too shy to tell us? You don't have to be so humble about it… Tell us about your duels, rampages and all the plots you used…"

* * *

**A/N**: We're assuming tank-on-tank war is a thing of distant enough past that there aren't any real war heroes left around. I found canon ridiculous here.

* * *

"I'm not a champion…"

"Then what is it?" Saori seemed to have finally realized the need for stealth as the nurse wasn't far off.

"Well, um…" Miho looked up at the grey ceiling, so different from the dull golden paint Kuromorimine used to paint its German vehicles, closer tot eh base colour of the metal… "the truth is… I come from a family that has a… long history of riding tanks."

Hana gasped in surprise, while Saori vocalized with "Wow!"

"…But I don't like tanks much myself. That's why… I came to this school, to try to avoid Tankery." Miho pulled the blanket up over her eyes in shame at lying to her friends. She didn't dislike tanks, she used to love them… but now she hated them with everything she was and had. She hated the expectations of her, the expectations that she'd follow her family style of victory above all else. She hated Tankery.

"I see…" Hana said softly.

"So that's what happened…" Saori nodded to herself. "If you don't want to do it, why force yourself?"

"Huh?" Miho's brown eyes peered out from under the blanket again.

"High school girls don't really do Tankery now anyway, I'm surprised they're offering it again at all."

"It's fine to say no to the student council, don't worry about it, we'll go with you."

Miho smiled as much as she could given they were on the topic of Tankery "Thanks you guys…"

The tolling of the bells meant Hana sighed "Well, it looks like class is over now, we were just starting to relax too."

"Homeroom is the only thing we have left." Saori added. Then the Pa gave two long beeps "What's happening?"

"Calling all students, be in the Gym, I repeat, be in the Gym!" The three girls shared a look before casting off their blankets and putting their shoes back on.

* * *

"So, um, what's going on?" Miho asked Saori.

"I don't know." Saori had answered the question itself, but not the intended question.

Hana explained what Miho wanted to know "This is just how our student council likes to do things."

"Everyone's gotten used to it?"

Monocle Girl sounded as severe as ever as she growled "Quiet everyone, we're starting orientation on our students' mandatory electives for this semester."

Miho's shoulders tensed as the standard briefing reel "Introduction to Tankery" began to play. She shivered even more when the clip talked about how the clatter of tracks was supposed to be "cute and lively". _Tell that to the Churchill in my nightmares it crushed my skull, or the desperate churning of the Panzer 3's treads as it tried to get back onto the road or at least prevent itself from sliding into the water._ She thought bitterly.

"…a better wife," _Yes, and that's exactly why Father said she'd become a "woman of ice" when he presented her with the divorce papers and told her that she had changed too much for him to stay, and that she wasn't the woman he'd married anymore. Then again, I can't blame him, whenever Mother wasn't busy with business she was always working on extra lectures, tactical books, and so on, I don't think I've ever seen her spend time with Father or interact with him at all except when picking Maho up from home for training sessions. Give someone a few good years of neglect and it wouldn't be surprising for them to leave._ Miho thought hatefully, she had been sneaking around when she shouldn't have been when she came upon the sight of her father pushing the papers across the desk, and had been frozen in place as her mother had signed with a flourish and told him, without even trying to salvage things, "Your goals and ideals have obviously come to differ too much from mine, now leave my household and never come back." The newsreel followed with "a better mother" and Miho's head sunk further, wishing she was mad enough to spit on the ground or stand up and throw something at the screen and scream in defiance, but as the new girl she had to keep her head down and blend in for a while before trying to start to get anything done her way. At least her mother had taught her how not to deal with people or any kids she might have someday, that was an important part of parenting, right?

"You will become healthier," _unless you die like the crew of that Panzer 3 might have if I hadn't helped them with the hatches before they all drowned_ "kinder," _Pah, look at my Mother, fucking lies, all of this._ "stronger," _Maho has only become weaker over the years as all ability to resist unreasonable commands has been beaten out of her, now that I have gotten free, I will grow to be far stronger than she will be. Thank you, Maho, for making sure that my failure could get me a ticket out by being heiress, I promised myself that I would grow to be stronger than you so that your sacrifice will not be in vain. Perhaps you don't even quite know that I am aware of all this… but I am. Few ever suspect the sweet, seemingly innocent younger sister of knowing much after all, though admittedly I only truly realized after Mother pounced on you for the team's failure in last year's National Finals and only gave me a short dressing-down. Thank you… or should I say tank you, sister._ "and men from all over the world will fall at your feet." _Hah, only if you shoot them and they fall dead, because professional athletes in Tankery… we're… I mean they're more married to their vehicles than they can ever be to anything else. Even if a man doesn't want to be the most important thing in your life he still wants to at least register somewhere on your radar above the level of a stranger._

* * *

**A/N**: This comes from the fact that Miho, growing up in such an environment, would have learned enough to, by her teens, analyze their butler/servant woman's words in the prequel manga, along with Emi's analysis, as proof enough as to what Maho had chosen to do for her. She's not dumb you know.

* * *

"You may not know, but a few years ago it was decided there would be a Tankery World Championship held in Japan. As a result the Ministry of Culture asked that all schools strengthen their Tankery teams in preparation for the upcoming event." Monocle Girl said.

"So, we've decided to end our school's current hiatus on Tankery." The president said, cheerily as usual. "If you choose it as your elective, we'll give you a bunch of cool benefits. Vice President?"

"Those who perform well in the course will receive one hundred meal tickets, two hundred free passes if you're late, and finally three times the credit you receive in another class!" The busty girl said, while Miho stared _Wait, what? So Monocle Girl is Public Relations? She's about as un-PR as possible with her severe attitude and appearance though…_

Somewhere in the crowd, Mako perked up at the mass of perks. _Even if that nightmare thing was a premonition, if I drive extra well and we reinforce the safety measures I'm sure we can overcome it… three credits… two hundred late passes… hmm…_

"So that's that, thanks everyone!" The president said loudly, waving as they walked off the stage

* * *

"That's it, I'm in!" Saori said as they walked along the path outside the school buildings.

"What?" Miho questioned, not sure she'd heard quite right

"I read in a magazine" Miho's mind immediately wrote off most of the rest of the statement from Saori as junk data, though she still somewhat listened to it to not miss anything "that modern guys like girls that are strong and dependable, and if Tankery's popular, it'll make you popular too. You should take it too Miho, your family does it, right?"

Miho's grimace was forced at best, in reality she wanted to throw something at Saori—preferable Saori herself, however that might work—and scream in her face about how awful Tankery actually was for interpersonal relationships and everything else in life "I don't… I don't know…"

"I understand." Hana said while Miho's mind snapped back with _No, no you don't. Don't even try._ "It's difficult isn't it? It may not seem like it, but I'm in a similar situation. My family history is in flower arrangement."

"Oh, I see…" Miho sighed internally _Family expectations… true of all cultures, particularly East Asian, probably part of why Dad, who was from America, couldn't take the strict aloofness anymore and left, still, he'd taught me enough before leaving for me to blaze my own trail, though Maho was a lost cause as we all knew mother would focus on indoctrinating her more than me._

"But Tankery does seem rather wonderful, don't you think?"

Miho was taken aback, had Hana succumbed and become another brainwashed victim? "Huh?"

"The truth is, I've always wanted to do something that keeps me a little more active than flower arranging."

"…Uh…" Miho couldn't think of much to say that wouldn't be a very loud rant about _"Save yourself you madwoman, do some sport or something instead of the soul-crushing implement that is Tankery!"_

Hana stopped, turning toward Miho and clasping her hands together in front of her "I'm going to do Tankery too, I've decided!"

"WHAT?" Miho gaped at the taller girl.

"Nishizumi, you should do it with us, teach us everything you know."

"Ungh…" Miho looked around, unable to meet Hana's eyes "Ugh…"

"If you take it, I bet you'll be able to make it to the top of the class, no problem!" Saori clapped her hands onto Miho's shoulders.

She couldn't answer, but her silence meant Hana and Saori both got the hint and left the subject alone soon enough. She did not speak again that evening, not even when she was alone and contemplating the elective selection sheet, full of rage and hate for her family's way of victory above all else, even actual survival.

* * *

_The next morning…_

Tired eyes from a night of zero sleep submerged in an ocean of hate were averted downward "Sorry guys, I… I can't do it. The only reason I came here was so I wouldn't have to do Tankery."

Saori and Hana shared a look "It's okay!"

"I'm sorry for making you worry about this…" They both brought their pens out and crossed out the circles they'd put next to Tankery, circling next to Incense instead to match Miho's selection.

"Huh?"

"You pick whatever you like and we'll go with you." Saori explained.

Miho found this unacceptable to her moral compass "No way! You two wanted to do Tankery!"

"It's fine! We wanted to be with you more!" Saori was al smiles.

"If we're in Tankery and talk about it with you all the time, even if you're not in it yourself, you may be reminded of some old memories that you'd rather forget." Hana explained.

"Uh…" Miho wanted to cry at having someone actually care like this after her father left. Her mother and sister had always been very aloof about things on the few occasions they showed they gave a damn at all. "No, I'll be okay!"

"We just became friends, I don't want to make you feel bad already." Hana pushed.

"I'm the type of girl who gets into whatever a boyfriend is into so don't worry about me!" Saori was tapping her index and middle fingers together while making a peace symbol.

Miho's mouth worked up and down a couple times before she simply blushed and smiled slightly.

Over lunch however Miho was called to the student council office and the first major confrontation of her time at Ooarai began.

"Mind telling me what THIS is about?" The PR chief held up Miho's elective selection sheet like an arrest warrant.

"Are you too good for Tankery or what?" The president said from her high-backed office chair.

"At this school, there's almost no one with any Tankery experience." The PR chief said, looking to the VP.

The other girl's comment was "We'll be wiped out, our school will be wiped out." Miho's eyes narrowed slightly, though still downcast, at those words. _What does she mean by that?_

"Will you stop being so selfish?" Saori snapped, while Miho was thinking The student council's top three wouldn't be so insistent if there wasn't something big at stake here.

"That's right, she said she doesn't want to do it." Hana said in what was a relatively loud voice for her. "And now you're trying to force her?"

"Miho's not going to do Tankery!" Saori's bluntness was again bared. Miho on the other hand was thinking _Save yourselves, it's clear they're not going to give up, save yourselves before you attract their ire!_

"Please leave Nishizumi alone." Hana said.

"You know if all of you hate this school so much I could arrange to have you ejected from it…" the president sounded casual, and Miho's frown grew deeper _They wouldn't risk their positions by abusing their powers for no reason, so that statement earlier about the school being wiped out had to mean something._

Saori gasped, while Hana merely sounded disappointed "I can't believe you're threatening us"

"This is not a threat, the president is always serious." Miho ground her teeth at the girl's words _Great PR there, you bitch._

"That's right." Miho snorted mentally at the president's affirmation, it was obvious they were willing to try just about anything to get her into the Tankery class, most likely to lead it or be an assistant teacher for it. _If you put your cards on the table I might consider it, but to be used like you're trying to do… NOPE._

"I think you guys should probably apologize before it's too late." Miho grimaced at the VP's attempts to stop the situation from escalating. _Hmm, we have a mediator type here…_ "Please?"

Saori looked like she was about to lunge at someone, clearly enraged by the insinuation that THEY had to apologize "STOP IT!"

"We are not going to be cowed by your abuse of your powers." Hana's eyes were narrowed in aggression.

The exchange continued while Miho sighed. _They wanted to do Tankery, and now they are being dragged down with me because I didn't… and it sounds like something serious will happen to this school if our team loses too soon in this year's nationals… Hmm… well, they say the bird that sticks its head out is shot first, but it seems they want me to captain the team, it may be better to just cast the die and let the pieces fall where they may. If the team does well I'll have a firmly entrenched position of influence in this school, but if I don't try, we'll be in major trouble, possibly even kicked out of the manipulative bitch gets her way._ Images of the risks it would entail, of crew members being cut down one by one after she (literally) falls first, flashed through her mind, _but a warning means a possibility of the future that can be overcome, right?_ "Alright, that's enough! I'll do it… I'll do Tankery."

"WHAT?" Miho quailed as her friends rounded on her with expressions of astonishment. _Wow, Saori, I was not previously aware it was physically possible for someone's mouth to be open quite that wide…_

"Thank goodness!" the VP clasped her hands together and looked extremely relieved, the president let out a pleased hum and even the PR chief cracked a grin and chuckled happily._ Yep, they definitely need me in this._ Miho thought. _Well, since I'm stuck in this again…_ she was glad she'd learnt form her mother enough emotional discipline to be able to throw the kill-switch on her hate of Tankery if she really wanted to. _Let's destroy everything in Ooarai's path to victory and prove once and for all that MY methodology is superior to the cold, calculating, tightly regimented steamroller the Nishizumi family is known for!_

…_Hmm, I think a quote I heard on the road sometime used between the Nishizumi disciples… wonder where it's from. Still, it applies here… PEACE (in my family—if it can be called one and not a miniature totalitarian police state)…THROUGH… POWER!_

* * *

**A/N**: European culture has a thing for trying to dodge fate. Asia is more prone to facing and overcoming it at the last moment since they believe that dodging outright often just makes things worse. Believe me, I would know.

I wonder if Miho's got Sixth Sense trained… they definitely have the Brothers in Arms perk and I'm quite certain anyone from the Nishizumi school knows Jack Of All Trades, and given Miho's skill at teaching/inspiring her crew the Mentor skill is almost certainly at 100%… Also, losing one match in ten thousand equals potential expulsion? That's the most ridiculous thing I've ever heard (and probably said by Maho just to make her crew STFU), so they never spar in training battles? Because when someone wins someone else MUST lose, after all, except for draws, and I don't think they're well enough choreographed for 100% draw rate in training matches. As for why I mentioned 6th sense, my favourite line from World of Tanks forums is, after all "While I perform necromancy on my radio operator and wait for the magical track monkeys to fix my tracks, I sometimes get the extra-sensory feeling that someone is watching me."

REVIEW!


	3. Mood Swings

A/N: We'll be seeing a bit of how Miho is bipolar here, I think. **The dub I'm watching has no Japanese honorific terms so I have no idea what to use where (I read Chinese well enough to be basically incapable of getting lost in Tokyo a la road signs, but I have nearly zero Japanese knowledge). Use your own understanding of Japanese to add them if you want.**

I only give A/N's in the middle of a long section of stuff IF I feel that it is mandatory for readers to know something right away that I found… problematic. This chapter is named due to Miho being bipolar, Yukari tending to nerdgasm, and Mako being weird every morning.

* * *

Chapter 3: Mood Swings

_SS (School Ship) Ooarai, 2nd day of new term, evening._

"Are you sure you'll be alright with this?" Hana asked as they sat at an ice-cream bar, having given Miho a bit of time to cool down.

"Uhuh." She meant it too, Maho might have inherited their father's protectiveness of them and desire for them to find their own way, but Miho had the latter… and what she'd like to think was a refined version of the "Might makes right" policy of her mother. Of course, there was the important tenet that Tankery was not war that she had that her mother seemed to fail or choose not to grasp. It was partly something that her father had taught her and Maho, his American casualness about anything that wasn't actually life and death, and something Maho had learnt to hide from their mother. It was also partly something she learnt from watching Maho's toppling the German team in the international championship six years ago with German vehicles on both sides. The crew of the German flag tank had rewired the automatic engine shut-off after they were hit and just kept moving toward the lake one of Maho's subordinates' tanks had sunk into before bailing out and diving in for the rescue. Afterward, when they were told they would have been disqualified for such a move (overriding the automatic engine shutdown) even if they'd hit the Japanese flag tank first, the German commander was famously seen giving the judge a two-fingered salute and was recorded as saying "Even a single life is worth far more to us than a title in a sports competition, our country is the one with the most experience in World War Two tank warfare, and this is NOT it."

As a result, in the subsequent internet opinion shit-storm statements such as "Such a brutal trick, no less than we'd expect from the team of a country that used to take bushido too seriously and threw babies off cliffs back in World War Two on Saipan and other islands! And such ultra-competitiveness, trying to make up for being unable to do decent tank battles after the first year or so of the War?" tended to come to the fore. That was, typical of internet babble (i.e. 99% hate-rants), regardless of the fact that the German team would almost certainly have lost anyhow unless they pulled a very well-done stunt out of their tank's exhaust pipe and got a theoretically penetrating hit on the Japanese Team flag tank first.

"You don't have to force yourself you know." Saori said, bringing Miho abruptly back to the present.

"I'll be okay." _Yes, yes I will be, and I will make sure that Ooarai goes at least to the semi-finals on its first year after two decades of not participating in Tankery. Then next year we'll take home the championship, I'll show those ice bitches whose mentality is superior! Hmm… it seems my mind just completely shifted gears once I accepted that I was stuck in this, a good mix of traditional Japanese dedication and American adaptability…or should I say crassness or blasé attitude? Well, whatever it is, it's good, it means we might actually be able to have a chance._

"Are you sure?" Hana asked, softly as was her usual.

_Calm down girl, be a bit more hesitant in your reply, you don't want them thinking you're bipolar yet… even though you probably are. Then again I don't think talking to myself in second-person is very mentally healthy, even in my head. Well, maybe the truth might be good? Even I'm not sure if this will backfire on me… all of us soon-to-be Tankery students… or not._ "I… I think I made the right choice." _Change the topic!_ "I was… happy, that you two were fighting so hard for me." _No one ever did, not since Dad left…or should I say quit years after Mother changed. To have two people I've known for less than thirty-six hours take a stand against pretty much the top authority of a school-ship…_ She couldn't say it looking in their eyes, it would be too embarrassing to admit the fact… so she stared at the sweet potato ice cream she had "That was… the first time something like that happened to me. No one ever thought about how I felt, they never bothered to ask me. My mom" She forced herself to use that term to present at least a semblance of normality "and sister always thought of Tankery as something the family just did without thinking about it."

_According to Dad, such a way was comparable to, to quote him: "If before the invention of fire humans always ate meat raw then should they have continued doing so after they invented fire? The groups that did so for tradition died out or were eliminated by the ones who learnt to cook their food. Time brings change, and that means each generation must not only follow the previous but diverge to forge their own path at some point where they feel it is appropriate and beneficial to change things up." I agree with him, and Mother had seemed too too, even though I can barely remember the times before she… changed._ "Those two have talent, so it was fine for them at least," Miho perked up a bit at her own bitter inside joke. _They will always be better in discipline, gunnery and all that other stuff, but what does it take to be a real tanker? Hah, there we disagree…_ "but I… I'm not like them." She cast her eyes down again as her spirits sunk. _At the going down of the sun, and in the morning, I rejoice at that fact, and mourn that Maho had to consign herself to a form of mental slavery, the worst kind of slavery, so that I may live free. I will save you one day, sister, it may not be tomorrow, it may not even be anytime soon, but I swear that you will be free one day, as free as I am, and hopefully less bipolar._ "I'm always…" She wasn't sure what she could say next short of spewing everything, or otherwise launching on a self-demeaning rant, preferably the latter, or just letting things trail off…

Fortunately for Miho, the decision was taken out of her hands when Saori and Hana tactfully offered her a way out by sharing their ice cream "Here! Try some sweet potato ice cream with chocolaty chips!" "And try this one too, it has mints."

Miho smiled happily, full of relief, glad they wouldn't pursue the colossal family problems she had any further "Wow, that's good! I like both."

"Let me have some of yours Miho!" Saori's spoon, having recently passed Miho's mouth, now delved into her ice cream.

"Pudding is good too!" Hana said from the other side, sticking it to Miho's ice cream in similar fashion.

"You took too much, you're going to eat it all…" Miho protested playfully, still brimming with relief that the dangerous topic had passed, for now. She knew she'd have to tell them sooner or later, but… she'd prefer to put it off for now, cement their bonds further before spilling such a deep conflict upon them.

* * *

_The next day… Garages_

_Hmm, I wonder why these doors are so damned tall, it's not like we're likely to have some ridiculously huge vehicle like an E-100 (If Ooarai did the school should have sold it for extra funds given how run-down some of the club houses are), the doors could be half a metre to a metre shorter, and I hope those two windows up there above each garage door aren't for full floors of storage spaces, because it's stupid to have rooms full of even heavier parts sitting over the head of a tank, all it takes is one support column failing and, well… Just the roof falling in wouldn't damage a tank much, a ceiling with tons of equipment on it? That would be… bad._ Miho questioned the design of the facility, she questioned it a lot, unless it was to prevent claustrophobia and was designed with catwalks above from which all work could be coordinated or as space for gantry mechanisms…

"Tankery class will now begin." The PR Chief said as the student council placed themselves at the head of the small crowd.

"What were the tanks again?" Hana questioned.

Miho continued the inquiry with "Tigers or…" _I'm very familiar with those types… with most German tanks, actually._

"I forget." The council president shrugged as the VP entered the codes to open the garage doors. They creaked, loudly, from disuse.

"Uh…" Miho's mind said _At least it's German, but it needs some repairs, and the garage needs a LOT of cleaning… and probably a fumigation first._

"What the heck…"

"It's falling apart…"

Her other classmates didn't seem optimistic, but Hana said "It's got personality, wouldn't you say?"

Saori didn't agree "I think the word you're looking for is rust."

Miho walked up and rapped the hull of the Panze couple times, then looked at the treads for a bit "It looks like the armour and treads are just fine, we might be able to work with this!" The class gasped, as if this was surprising to them… then again, it could reasonably have been given the vehicle and garage's dilapidated condition.

"Are you sure we can work with this beat-up thing?" Saori looked sceptical as she poked the hull and a flake of rust fell off.

Miho grimaced as she popped open the hatches to let it air out, because rusting depleted oxygen so it may not be safe even though there were holes in the hull i.e. vision slits "Probably."

"I think newer tanks are better, just like finding a new guy!" Miho was surprised by Saori's pronouncement. _You're a player? Really Saori? You'd think you'd get some experience first before being a player…_

"I don't think that's right…" Hana disagreed.

"How am I wrong? Anyway, we only have one tank here, right?"

"With the number of people we have…" The Student Council VP said worriedly.

"We'd need five total." PR said.

"How about we all go looking for tanks?" The President said, and Miho had a sudden wave of doubt wash over her as to whether she was currently in an asylum or not, because that had to be the most absurd-sounding idea she'd ever heard of…

"WHAT?" It seemed the class agreed.

"Looking for tanks? How are we supposed to do that?" Some of the freshmen chirped.

"Well, our school got rid of Tankery two decades ago, but the tanks that were used should still be aboard somewhere…" PR said "no, I'm sure they're here. Our Tankery instructor/supervisor should be here the day after tomorrow. We'll find the remaining four tanks we need before then."

"Where do you think we might find them?" One of the four history buffs standing to one side—if the Afrika Korps hat and trench coat on the leader was any indication—asked.

"We're looking for them because we don't know where they are." The President held her hands up to shoulder level, palms up, and shrugged. _I suddenly foresee a lot of being trolled happening to me this year…_ Miho thought.

"You don't have any idea at all?" One of the freshmen questioned.

The President put her hands on her hips, still grinning "Nope."

"Very well, start the search." PR ordered to much groaning.

"This is a lot different from what we were told, isn't doing Tankery supposed to make you popular?" Saori grumbled.

"Our pretty cool instructor is coming the day after tomorrow." The President walked up to her.

Saori suddenly snapped to attention "Ohmigosh REALLY?" It seemed she hadn't paid too much attention when PR had been talking about it.

"Yeah, really" The president said with a smile, Saori squealed a little at this "I'll introduce you…"

"I'll get going!" Saori rushed out of the garage with a happy spin to get moving on the search.

* * *

"Ugh…Where are they?!" Saori scanned the main parking lot of the school to no avail.

"I don't think there are any tanks in the parking lot." Hana said with a smile at Saori's frustration.

"But they're sort of cars, aren't they?"

Miho shrugged "I don't know, sometimes things are in the most obvious places… but you'd think someone would have noticed a tank sitting in the parking lot and called the school to have it removed to the garage already. Saori's right though, they are technically automobiles, if one is to be picky about the wording."

"Let's go to the forest on the other side then, they say if you want to hide something, do it in a bunch of trees." Saori left Hana off.

Miho began to follow before noticing a girl stalking her from behind a nearby tree, and thought _Well, Saori seems to be prophetic in a way, since someone did try to hide with trees, and would have succeeded too if she hadn't started to follow us as we were leaving._ The girl yelped upon being detected and ducked back into cover, but it was a bit too late. Miho let it be, figuring she'd approach on her own with time She only made it a few paces before the face clicked in her head. _Blood, warm, crimson, soaking hands trying to stem the flow… a look of pained anguish and a choked noise, then finally understanding and resignation before she slumps against the ruined breech block and expires…_ Miho shook the morbid image off for now, the same image that had burnt the face of the girl following her into her mind forever, as she took a deep breath in. before whipping around, causing the trailing girl to jump "Um… excuse me, would you like to come with us to look for tanks?"

"Are you sure?" Miho noted the blush that rose on the other girl's cheeks and the wide eyes. _Are you trying to give me puppy eyes? Because you, if you've been following Tankery recently, know those don't work on Nishizumi family members, right?_ "Well… I…" Her clasped hands lowered from near her chin to all the way down and she looked down at the ground while rocking from foot to foot. "That is… I'm in standard class two, second year class three, Yukari Akiyama." She snapped to attention as if realizing something "Um, I'm not that experienced, but it'll be nice to work with you." Yukari bowed to the three of them, as Saori and Hana had backtracked once the words started up behind them, though her eyes were extremely wide, darting between their faces as if she'd seen them before in less pleasant circumstances. _Good work on hiding the fangirl, Yukari, I haven't seen better to date, but why is there alarm in your eyes?_ Miho thought, impressed since it was clear this girl was a fan—she'd seen Maho have to deal with enough and had to fend off a few of her own before—but she wasn't letting it affect her too much.

The two girls now behind Miho introduced themselves before Miho started, but was cut off by Yukari's "Oh, I already know, Miss Miho Nishizumi, right?"

"Yeah…" _Good to see some people still follow Tankery closely on TV._

"Very nice to meet you all." Yukari saluted, before pulling out a rather large topographic map from the backpack she was wearing. "This is a detailed topographic map of the core school grounds, we can use this to determine vantage points from which we can look for anything that looks like a tank!"

"Huh, it says something about the organization level of this place twenty years ago if cancelling Tankery means the tanks were just dumped in random places and forgotten." Miho commented as they began moving toward the woods.

"I suppose so, but it's possible that they were left where they were with the expectations that they would be retrieved, but that never happened after the cancellation of the class." Hana said before she stopped short. Miho was subsequently treated to a look at the wondrous powers of a florist's nose which led them to an abandoned Panzer 38(t) which caused Yukari to almost nerdgasm, but that was another story…

* * *

_The next day (4th day of term)_

Miho was, at best, astonished and at worst completely flabbergasted as to how the hell a Type 89 Infantry Tank found itself in a rock crevice halfway up a cliff face—granted the cliff wasn't very large according to the Student Council President but still. Then there was the issue of how a Sturmgeschutz III (StuG 3) was left at the bottom of a pond—the steel had been a stainless variety so it wasn't hopelessly corroded, fortunately—and how the hell an M3 Lee ended up in an old storage room that had become a nest for rabbits. She learnt all of this by idle chatter with the other three groups sent out in the hunt for vehicles while they passed the day it would take for the vehicles to be retrieved. They were assigned vehicles that afternoon and told that the instructor who was to supervise the re-integration of Tankery into the school curriculum would be arriving the next afternoon.

If there was ever a documentary of some sort made of her life, Miho suspected that the afternoon of her fourth day attending school at Ooarai would definitely qualify for a montage of some sort. _If such a documentary was ever made and aired,_ she thought as she cleaned the radio sets and checked their functionality, _the swimwear the Student Council VP had donned to handle the amount of water involved in the initial cleaning job would definitely qualify as fan-service given she has a noticeable bust._ Mad musings of what her life would be like if popularized in media aside, once they finally finished the initial cleaning Miho was more in agreement with Saori's "I wanna take a shower" than Yukari's "I wanna take it for a spin." None of the tanks she'd handled before had been THIS dilapidated before the cleaning and other inspections, including gun barrel bore inspections, breech block checks, and so on. Then again, for machines not maintained and often stuck in hostile environments (The StuG!) for _up to twenty years_, the vehicles were in remarkably good shape.

After school, Yukari took them all to an interesting tank enthusiast shop. Unfortunately they didn't have the funds to buy the 75mm L/43 or better yet L/48 that the Panzer 4 could have been outfitted with, so they couldn't upgrade their vehicle to a later model. Miho was unpleasantly reminded of her own personal problems when the TV in a corner of the store showed a reporter asking her sister some questions. Maho's quote about how to win was "Never give up, and never run away, no matter the situation." Miho didn't agree, since surviving to continue the fight was better in terms of doing damage to the enemy than banzai charges. But of course, if Maho was classifying ordered fighting retreats as not a form of running away then…

Her friends noticed her frown and clenched fists, and Saori brought out the bright idea of coming over to her place to hang out to distract her. It almost worked too. That evening, Miho learnt that Yukari liked being hideously over-prepared and that Saori had "mad kitchen skillz".

* * *

A/N: "It's time to eat!" Um… stating the obvious much? Yeah, take the anime scenes and cut that line out and you have what happened in this scene break.

* * *

_The morning after… Ooarai +5D_

"Are you okay?" Miho asked, she had been running late, but this girl was stumbling along the sidewalk like a zombie.

"It's painful…" Miho's mind recoiled in surprise, and so did her body Huh? That… that voice! "All life is… painful… if this were a dream, everything would be… fine…" She fell to her knees and her head tilted back, letting out a sigh as if dying on the spot.

"Hey! Pull yourself together!" The girl, _Mako, if my premonition got it right…_ emitted a pained moan as Miho pulled her up by grabbing onto her upper arms

The girl returned to looking forward instead of up now with a sudden "But… I will go… I must… go…" She continued to wobble along, and Miho rolled her eyes before pulling one of the girl's arms over her shoulders and helping her toward school.

"Miss Reizei, this is the two hundred and forty-fifth day in a row that you are late." The morals committee officer at the main school yard gate said as they approached, sounding exasperated. Miho was rather impressed. _That's… pretty much a one hundred percent late record if she's a second-year like I am… wow… how do you even manage to pull that off without being expelled?_

"Why does morning have to come anyway?" Mako Reizei, if Miho had it right, mumbled, leaning on the brunette girl.

"Morning comes every day you know." The gate monitor sounded rather condescending. Then again, Miho supposed that monitoring lateness records would make anyone pretty pissed off if one person was late _every single day_. "Just because you get good grades doesn't mean you can just show up late all the time." _Well that explains why she hasn't been expelled._ "Don't blame me if you get held back…" There was a sharp inhalation by Miho's side.

"Are you okay?" Miho asked.

"Um, Miss Nishizumi, even if you see Reizei on your way to school, do yourself a favour and leave her behind from now on."

"Uh… Understood."

There was an angry murmur of "Sodoko…" from next to Miho.

"Did you say something?" Midoriko Sono, if the name band on her arm was correct, pushed.

Mako looked away "Not really." "Sodoko" (if Miho interpreted it correctly as the girl's nickname) let them in with an eye-roll at that. "Sorry." Mako said as they walked down a footpath.

"Not at all!" Miho said. It was a minor thing after all.

"I'll pay you back eventually…"

* * *

_One botched air-drop later…_

"Ugh, I'm going to have to fill out a requisition form for compensating the principal for fixing his car…" The instructor grumbled as she climbed out of the air-dropped Type 10 MBT. The botched air drop resulted in the tank sliding until its landing pallet rammed into and overturned the principals' car, breaking the windows in the process and denting a door, not to mention damaging the roof of the smaller vehicle. She smiled at the assembled class as she walked over "Yes, like everyone here, I hate paperwork." _Good way to seem more amicable while remaining very awesome/impressive to the students._ Miho noted.

"She's the special instructor the Tankery Training Unit sent us, Commander Ami Chono."

"Nice to meet you all, I hear there are lots of people here doing Tankery for the first time, but let's do the best we can… wait, aren't you the daughter of Instructor Nishizumi?" She stepped a bit closer to Miho, who shrank a bit from being singled out. "the Instructor has done a lot for me. Is your sister doing well?"

"Uh…" _I don't really know, we don't talk much anymore… a lot like how Mother and Dad didn't talk much anymore after she started to change._ "yes."

As the class questioned each other on what they were talking about, Ami explained "The Nishizumi School is the Tankery school with the longest history. They're really quite famous."

Saori decided to change the topic, noting how Miho's shoulders slumped slightly more at that. "Instructor, are you really popular with the guys?"

"Huh? Hmm… not so much popular so much as I always hit the target I aim for… I have a kill rate of a hundred and twenty percent."

"What's the extra twenty?" Miho asked, curious at the mathematical impossibility.

Ami smiled at the fact that someone caught the details instead of being too awed by her entry and general aura to question things, then again it wasn't surprising given who it was in this case. "Splash damage, when I turn on the charm full blast on a guy, if there are other guys sitting too close to him or in the right direction for the plash cone to strike them… collateral damage is hard to avoid." _Yeah, let's not talk about the way some guys stalk me for a few days after being caught in the splash… wouldn't help the popularity of this course given we already have so few people._ Ami thought.

There was an "Ohhhhh…." From the class collectively before Yukari's hand shot up "Uh, Instructor? What will we practice today?"

"Let's see…" _I can see any sort of simulation program backfiring if they're really new, so they need to learn to handle the actual vehicles a little before using any training simulations, after all clutch-based driving is very different from WASD steering._ Ami thought. _And of course the best way to learn their basic roles would be to have them take their vehicles for a spin and fire the guns a few times… at least the League covers maintenance fees for participating schools, given how bad I've heard Ooarai's doing financially._ "How about we throw you guys into things and try a mock battle?"

"Are you sure we can do that so soon?" The VP asked as the class descended into a semi-panicked hubbub.

"It will be fine, you need to gain experience. You just have to move the tank, point it where you want it to go" that had a double meaning of tank and gun "and shoot. Anyway… all of you should prepare to head to your respective starting points." She pulled out several copies of a map, which she'd prepared in case they really were noobs in Tankery. The garage doors were opened and Ami waited for them to assemble by their vehicles before starting in on the crew roles and the initiation lecture.

* * *

After some nerdgasm-extinguishing operations had to be performed against Yukari, driving pointers were given to Hana (fortunately no garage doors were harmed, though it was close) and a basic tutorial of loading (a very, very simple tutorial) was given to Saori, they moved out. "The student council team and history club team have the highest chances of knowing what they're doing to some degree, way, shape or form. The student council team is much closer than the history club though in terms of our start positions… HANA DODGE LEFT!" Miho ducked into the hatch just before they broke a tree branch with the cupola.

"Sorry, I can't hear you!" Hana yelled back.

"And this is why German crews were first to use internal headsets…" Miho sighed before explaining at Saori's clueless look "In the early Japanese tanks where the driver and commander were close together the commander would kick the driver to indicate which way to turn. This tank is too large and spacious for that, I guess it's cell phones then because we don't have the headsets yet. Yukari, do you have any bandages or strips of cloth that we can use to strap our cell phones to our heads?"

"It looks like you've all made it to your starting points." Ami called over their command channel "The rules are simple, you need to disable all other tanks, in other words, go forth, shoot up a storm and take out your opponent. Tankery starts with a bow and ends with a bow, all participants, bow." The tanks they were using all had the elbow space for that to work.

"Let's have a good match!" They chorused back over the common channel.

Miho's mind was working even while they were going through the formalities, looking at the map again. _Hmm, the volleyball club team are closer to us in start position in terms of traversing relatively clear areas of the forest, they'll probably come after us first, since we're the closest to them. They probably will try to take a near direct path to us so they should be approaching from that heading…_ "Turn left one hundred degrees and orient the gun thirty degrees to the left of the vehicle heading."

"Aren't we going after the student council first?"

"The Type 89 will probably come after us first, and they're closer even with the speed of their vehicle. We need to turn, now, to angle our armour, their gun is weak and should bounce off without much of an issue at those angles." There was the sudden boom of an APHE shell going off from a near miss. "Never mind, FLOOR IT HANA!"

"Can you yell a little softer?" Hana had winced at the volume coming over her phone as she threw the tank into accelerating, before a second shell landed near where they had been previously after the volleyball team got over the shock of firing a cannon for the first time.

"StuG ahead! Prepare to fire Saori, Hana turn right!" Miho barked as the StuG came into view on the fork of the road that face down their current path in a straight line. As they swerved a 75mm shell from the StuG flew by to their left. _How is that Type 89 moving fast enough to even temporarily keep pace with us? Unless… hmm, maybe, I suppose replacing the old, broken engine with a newer one from a modern car, though of similar rated output, would result in souping it up, a LOT._

She stood up in the cupola once they were no longer under fire, and suddenly noticed someone in their path straight ahead, lying against a tree stump with a book over her face. "WATCH OUT!" Miho shouted as a warning, Hana slammed on the brakes when she saw the obstacle, slamming Miho against the front of the cupola, braced only by her arms tensing as much as she could. "Oof…" She had the wind knocked out of her, but was otherwise fine. The formerly napping girl had just picked herself up and plucked the book off her face when the tank stopped a few metres away and Miho barked "Get on!" _No collateral damage statistics please… but we need to run away before the others catch up._ Miho thought. The girl complied and basically ran up onto the front deck before Miho told Hana "Get going!"

Once the girl had regained her balance, Miho noted "Huh… You're the girl from this morning…" _Whatever is arranging all this up there must find it hilarious how they're messing with our lives._

Saori, now that they were no longer under fire, popped out of the loader's hatch "Oh, it's Mako."

"Saori, huh?" Mako answered, possibly questioning why Saori was here.

"You two friends?" Miho looked to her right at Saori.

Saori nodded "Yeah, since we were kids. What are you doing here anyways? We're in the middle of class!"

"I know…" An explosion from behind reminded Miho of the danger they were in "Get in the tank, it's too dangerous to stay out!"

As they continued to move, Mako, who was now crouched on the floor of the turret basket in front of Yukari, slumped her head back into Yukari's lap. "There's not much oxygen…" She rasped.

"Are you okay?" Miho asked as she looked around with the periscopes.

"Mako has low blood pressure."

Miho frowned at Saori's statement. _Maybe she has a congenital heart condition?_ "She didn't seem to be doing very well this morning." She noted to Saori.

"And you met her?"

Miho nodded "Yeah."

Saori grinned "So that's why you were late!"

Miho didn't reply, instead she called "There's a bridge ahead, it's plated for tank movement, but not that sturdy overall, nor particularly wide. Stop the tank!" She popped open the cupola hatches and bailed out "Hana, drive slowly and unbuttoned, keep your eyes on the road, I'll help direct you just in case." She started waving the tank forward, feeling the bridge creak slightly under the weight but otherwise hold firm. Unfortunately one slip to the left meant that on the un-roughened metal plates paving the bridge, the tank started leaning left and Hana had to force all halt to prevent it from tipping sideways into and through the cords of the bridge as it wobbled.

The StuG caught up first and fired at them, but it seemed the Random Number God was with them and the shell ended up troll-bouncing off the left side of the vehicle, throwing it to the right somewhat and preventing it from falling off the bridge, though this threw the crew members around, including slamming Hana's head against the edges of her hatch. "Hana!" Miho shouted, without a response, she clamoured up the tank and down the commander's hatch before hauling Hana out of her seat and into the radio operator seat, untying her fortunately unbroken cell phone from her head. "I'm bad at driving, but I guess I have to…" The tank rumbled into motion and abruptly corrected itself on the paved steel boards that rested over the planks of the bridge.

"Mako, you can drive?" Saori asked incredulously.

"I learned just now." She sounded as monotone as ever.

"Just now?" Yukari looked dumbstruck.

Saori chuckled at the sight of Mako driving with the manual open in front of her"You're so top of the class…" Machine-gun fire started pinging off their vehicle, a common tactic to stress crews and reduce their efficiency.

"Still reversing, Mako?" I suppose if we get off we can outmanoeuvre the StuG and be nearly immune to the Type 89… but still with noobs gunnery would still hit at close range, and early Panzer 4's had paper armour relative to a StuG's gun.

"I know, I know, moving forward now." Mako moved forward just as the bridge behind them took two hits that tore up a few sections of planking with near misses. The explosions of the APHE slugs shocked Hana awake.

"Akiyama get the turret around to take out the StuG. You okay, Hana?" Miho looked down toward the taller girl as the basket began to turn.

"Yeah, sorry…"

"It's okay, rest for a little."

"No, no, I'm fine." Hana insisted, now more or less behind Miho.

"That's good." Miho raised her voice to get the point across to Mako "Prepare to fire!"

Mako brought the vehicle to a stop so that Yukari could aim properly… and the gun roared as it sent a round into the StuG's front armour's right-hand (for the StuG, left from the Pz 4's view) side. The StuG was not a heavily armoured vehicle, hence the white flag packet at the top was triggered by the internal damage analysis computer and raised the white flag of a disabled vehicle.

"Good hit! C Team is down and out!" Ami announced to all the teams before lowering her microphone and saying to herself "Ah, troll-bounces… then again they are new to the vehicles so aim should be quite horrible at any but point blank ranges, particularly as the optics probably haven't been recalibrated properly yet. Miss Nishizumi seems to be settling in quite comfortably to her role too, Shiho worries too much."

The Type 89 was a valid threat as they were behind the Panzer 4 at an angle that meant their shells COULD register as a penetration against the paper-thin rear armour. Miho allowed her subordinates a moment to feel the power of their first firing of a tank's main armament—though she found Hana's "That felt… good…" to be vaguely disturbing—before ordering "Kill the Type 89 next!" She looked out the periscopes toward the rear of the turret and observed the 38(t) and M3 Lee approaching down the road ahead of the Panzer 4. Yukari's shot managed to again hit the target, though a glancing blow, and the flimsy Type 89 registered it as a penetration and raised its disabled flags.

"Rotate turret about one-seventy to the right and engage the 38(t)." There was no way they could take a hit from the M3 Lee, but the 38(t) was closer and definitely higher in morale than the freshmen tank, plus they might have some idea of what they were doing, so they were the greater threat for now since their gun could penetrate the front hull of the Pz 4 Ausf. D if lucky, and definitely could "penetrate" the back of the turret (read: make the computer decide it was a penetrating hit).

The 38(t)'s round missed completely, probably due to not having enough time to lay the gun after stopping, while theirs slammed into its turret cheek and made the onboard processors decide it was finished, raising its flags. Then the M3 Lee tried to run away, only to get stuck in a mud puddle and, due to the inexperience and panic of the crew, dig itself in by trying to run its stuck tread too fast and disabling said tread. "Target the M3 Lee, if they start to turn the turret this way put a shell into the side of their tank before they finish turning." Miho told Yukari, fortunately for ammunition costs (though the League covered 90% of that), the freshmen didn't even try to turn the 37mm turret to engage Miho's tank, they popped the hatch open and manually held up a small white sheet of paper.

"All vehicles but the Panzer 4 have been rendered inoperable or capitulated, A Team, the Panzer 4, wins this practice battle." Ami announced as Miho's crew opened the hatches and popped out for some fresh air.

"Did we really win?" Saori held some wonder in her voice.

"It looks that way." Hana said, in her usual soft tone.

Yukari pulled herself out of her hatch, standing beside the turret on the deck of the tanks hull, and glomped Miho with "Wow! Miss Nishizumi totally got us there!" Miho blushed and chuckled embarrassedly at the action, before Yukari recovered from her nerdgasm and recoiled in horror, apologizing profusely.

"We will have staff members picking up and fixing up all inoperable tanks, members are to leave them and head back in." Ami announced.

Once they had all assembled in front of the garages again, Ami addressed them with "All of you did well for your first time, figuring out the basics from your reading of the vehicle manuals…" From the dumbstruck looks on some of the crews Ami mentally sighed, a change of wording appeared to be in order "and with trial and error. The rate of fire was quite acceptable given the vehicles you used and your level of practice in gun laying. All you really need to do now is practicing moving and firing every day, if there's something you don't know, send me an e-mail or talk to me sometime after class."

_I don't think I need to stay around very long, if they're participating in this year's nationals like President Anzu said they would be, then Miss Nishizumi will soon become Commander of this group and can take over training. At least none of them are likely to be at risk of blowing themselves up, which is one of the main reasons to sent special instructors out to schools new to Tankery in the first place, to make sure they can take care of their basics. The ludicrous amount of administrative work they usually have to be walked through from garage set-ups to safety lessons on tank maintenance and facilities maintenance can pretty much be waived here given apparently their automotive club has ridiculous vehicle-fu with how the vehicles were made fully operable within one day. Someone at the briefings office seems to have forgotten they have the facilities already set up and have basically a professional here already to help them learn. I'll be including that minor thing in my report once I get back. Still, the renovations of the facilities definitely bear monitoring, as well as teaching some more of the basics that come with this subject, I'd give it about a week or two before I'm cleared for recall._ That had been her thoughts on the assignment after she'd gotten a decent look around (read: while the students were working with fixing up their tanks).

* * *

_Gratuitous Bath Scene… (Laws of Anime + somewhat reasonable clothing + no panty-shots make this mandatory)_

"That was more exciting than a guy telling you he loves you for the first time!" Saori exclaimed. This claim crashed and burned seconds later as Hana shot it down. Saori's excuse was her father being a guy.

"Sounds like a nice father." Miho grimaced. _Dad would say it every once in a while, but usually left it unsaid because it didn't need to be said. I can't remember Mother saying it, and there was no chance she would ever say so after I turned five and she began to… change._ She shook her head a bit to rid it of such negativity. _After the first win one needs to encourage morale among one's crew!_ "Right, we have five people now, we should probably re-divide the roles so that nobody has to do two things… Saori, you can get along with just about anyone, would you consider being the radio operator?"

"Sounds nice, I can text really fast too."

"I don't think that'll do any good here." Hana said, making Saori pout.

"Depends on this year's rulebook, I suppose, though if I recall correctly phone calls are not permitted in matches, mostly because radios do the same thing, but I don't remember anything about texting…" Miho shrugged before continuing "Who else wants a change?"

"CAN I WORK THE TURRET PLEASE I'D REALLY LIKE TO!" Well, it wasn't yelling technically but give it was Hana it might as well have involved a megaphone and sub-woofer.

"I sense a disturbance in the Force." Mako deadpanned from where she was zoning out in another pool of water.

"Huh?" Miho's exclamation was twofold, both in the sense of Mako being awake instead of napping and Hana's extremely uncharacteristic raising her voice.

"I'll never forget that powerful feeling…" Hana was wriggling from side to side, and Miho had a sudden feeling that they should get Hana somewhere where she could have privacy for a while if she was trying to rub her thighs together for friction. "Also, I think I'll become a stronger girl if I do it."

Miho nodded _That makes sense, you'll get flustered less, unlike well… now… yeah, let's not go there, too awkward a thought._ "Okay, then you can be the gunner and man the turret!"

"Then that makes me the loader!" Yukari thumped her chest.

"So all we need is a driver." There was the sound of water hitting the floor and someone getting out of a pool as Miho turned around to look expectantly at Mako.

"Mako! Drive for us!" Saori said with her usual exuberance.

"I've already picked calligraphy."

Saori pouted "Bother…"

"You'd really be helping us out, Reizei!" Miho called. "You know there's two hundred excused lates and three full credits if you take Tankery, right?" That noticeably slowed the other girl's steps toward the fogged-up door to the bath area.

"Mako! You're not getting credit units because you're late all the time! If you don't take Tankery, you're gonna get held back!" Saori yelled as Mako finally ground to a halt.

The genius turned around with a growl "Grr… Alright, I'll switch to Tankery for you guys."

"You just want your units." Saori stated smugly.

Mako shrugged "Partly."

"We've got our five…" Hana's voice quavered like she was trembling on the edge of a climax. Then again, Miho suspected she could easily voice any adult anime with how soft her voice usually was, and with her physical appearance she could probably become an adult media star if she tried.

"Thank you for joining us." The two splashing sounds in quick succession meant Yukari had probably just learnt why not to salute with your hand starting underwater as one side of her face was splashed, producing the second sound.

Mako bowed in acknowledgement and Saori broke the happy chuckles of the four still in the bathing pool with "Alright! I know where we got to go now!"

"Huh?" _I have a sudden very bad feeling about this._ Miho's mind said.

* * *

A/N: I foresee this manifesting during the events of OVA 2: "Barbecue?" *Anglerfish team runs away and leaves the BBQ to the freshmen… and refuses to go put out the fire that results, hence what you saw in the OVA*

Lovey-Dovey Panzer series 4komas ensured I'd never look at Miho the same way again (That body armour, Killzone 3 anyone?). Fortunately in this one she isn't quite that insane. On the other hand, some of the questionable methods she'll be applying… never mind.

**Review replies:**

**Theralion**: Yep, it was intended to begin similarly with very different thoughts and rationales behind Miho's eyes after the hugely divergent prologue/premonition. Some events will change, but as I said in our PM, sometimes "The more things change, the more things stay the same". Note however that Operation Mousetrap will change, a LOT. As for Miho's parentage, what I said in PM partly holds true, but everything is not as it seems… Do you really think Maho could get away with her obvious rationale without Shiho allowing it or even backing it up behind the scenes?

REVIEW!


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